This week on WCG Ultimate Gamer, the game was NBA Live 09 and all the gamers tried to zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
What? Huh? Sorry about that, must have nodded off in my total boredom and disinterest. (Let's see how many time I can use the word "boring" this week boys and girls!) After Jamal's teabaggin' defeat of Dante last week, his "nanny nanny boo boo" return to the loft was surprising anti-climatic. Boo! However, one of SciFi's confusing habits to advertise the show while I'm watching the show reoccurred and this time they proudly proclaimed, "One gamer challenges a basketball legend to one on one. You won't want to miss this." Whatever SciFi...My only hope is that the "legend" is Meadowlark Lemon come out of retirement and the "one on one" includes regulation ladders and chairs.
Meanwhile, on another episode of "As The Gamer Turns", Jamal proclaims, "I am the best gamer in the house". (As long as Rob's playing back up I'm assuming) and Ciji, still basking in her now Dante-free environment, gushes, "I hope that's the end of the drama". *cue dramatic foreboding music* and begin tearful emotional screaming match between Mark and Ciji.........NOW! Let me spare you here, Mark is totally denying everything and it's plain that he's used this tactic before because he is so good at it he can make you doubt your own name. What ensues is a screaming match betwixt our two young gamers with Amy valiantly trying to play interference. Ciji cries and storms off with Mark rubbing his hands in glee at his clever use of "Oh yeah, well I'm rubber and you're glue!" *cut to Rob smirking* So this either means that all Ciji is interested in is creating drama OR Mark is a stereotypical asshat that thinks he can do what he wants and deny his way out of it...
So on to the Real Life Challenge where Karen from The Office (looking fabulous as usual, this time dressed in a sleeping bag) announces this week's game and tells them to get dressed in their very own sleeping bags, er, I mean personalize basketball jerseys. Mark is peeing himself in joy of a game that he "is so good" at playing. They're going to have a dunking contest and who are the judges but Spud Webb, Darryl Dawkins and Lisa Leslie! (Look at me acting like I know who these people are, I'm so good!)
So now you know the judges, 3 guesses at to which "basketball legend" gets challenged to a "one on one" by which gamer. You're so smart! After getting a bad score on one of his dunks, Jamal the Jackass challenges Lisa Leslie to one on one because he "can take her anytime in real basketball". Really Jamal? And just why did he zero in on the female legend? I was half hoping she would have as much class as Jamal and take him up on the offer. I was really looking forward to watching them scrape Jamal off the court.
So now I'm bored so long story short, Swoozie is in first place and Jamal is in last place. Back at the loft, they all scurry away to try and become great at NBA Live 09, except for Mark, who tries to help Ciji play better. Rob, who has a habit of saying he's not strong in any game except Halo 3 apparently, goes to Jamal and tells him to make sure to score lower than Rob in the Isolation Challenge, after all Rob save his butt in the Elimination Challenge last week right? And once again Rob's concern is unfounded as it's (unsurprisingly) Ciji in last with Mark in first.
And here Mark makes a strange comment after placing first, "Finally my day has come". Uh...he does remember placing first last week, right? I'd say his day came last week...
Anyhoo, Amy is all in a snit again because she is really convinced with every elimination challenge that the first place person is going to pick her. I can't decide if this is due to her thinking everyone views her as a threat or her fear that all the boys want to get rid of the girls (which I would find funny except for Jamal). So she goes running to Mark pleading her case to not be up against Ciji with Mark essentially saying, "Whatever dude". He does comment that he doesn't think they'll expect what he's going to do. Whatever dude, you better wow me!
Now, in my most humble opinion, if I was Mark I would pick Rob to go against Ciji. It can't be missed on Mark that Rob's running around trying to keep himself in the loft during a week on his "weakest game". In my mind, Rob is big competition so get rid of him when the opportunity arises. Or get rid of Chelsea, she is MEGA b-o-r-i-n-g so get rid of her during an equally boring game, perfect! So just who does Mark pick to go up against Ciji.....hmmmm hmmmm hmmmm?
Dude, we've already been through the whole "putting yourself up against the last place" with Swoozie and Geoff. It's been done and it's boring. Not only that but once again we're stuck with an Elimination Challenge with no drama, no excitement and no tension. Fabulous...
After Mark's groundbreaking decision, Jamal decides to become Ciji's "big brother and help her in this time of need". So he grabs a big honking glass of white wine and heads off to try and recreate the training scene from Karate Kid. And then it's time to head off to Samsung Stadium to say goodbye to Ciji.
Ciji arrives in her usual arraignment of face bling, plaid and funky boots and Mark arrives looking like a lumberjack getting ready to go camping. Once again, there's great effort but of course Mark wins. I think even more disgusting than Jamal's teabagging of Dante was Mark's smarmy send off to Ciji, "I don't totally feel like a winner cause I lost a really good friend today". How he said that with such a straight face I'll never know. Ciji did her best to hold her eye rolling back and I was wishing she'd walk straight up to him and kick him in the teabags. I guess that'll teach Ciji to go running her mouth when Mark is trying to get his mac and cheats on!
6 gamers are left and according to next week's promo, we only have 2 episodes left (?!) and next week they're playing everything they've already played...I guess my suggestion of them playing competitive Peggle was ignored.
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